I Was Only Raking Leaves

I was only raking leaves.
Raking piles of leaves like snow drifts
wind-blown against the house,
raking them away from the pathway.
The gusts responsible for this pile up
lingered still,
at first blowing the leaves back,
undoing my work.
The wind, like an unruly puppy,
Wagging and wriggling around my legs.
danced around me, through me,
teasing me.
So,
I talked to the wind.
“Nooo”, I pleaded, “not over there”
as the leaves spurted up into the air
waist high,
and scuttled,
re-cluttering the pathway.
I fought to gather the leaves with my rake,
the wind puffs shifted,
blowing the leaves in the direction I was moving them.
I giggled with the wind.
“Yes, thank you.”
My task became easier,
and I chose to believe there was a power in the wind,
playing with me in the morning sun.
I was not alone in the autumn morning frolic
of leaves and wind
and sun and rake
and me.
I was courting the Power in the wind,
flirting with the Power in air current.
Then the Power in the wind
kissed my legs,
embraced the back of my knees,
and the inside of my thighs,
then laughed softly in my ears.
I fell in Love right then,
and walked with a quiet grin
throughout the temperate, autumn day.

Wild, Like a Wood Sorrell Bloom On the Forest Floor

I discovered a precious gift today. It bubbled up out of the memories of my childhood experience of emotional and physical abandonment by my well-intentioned, but oh so young, parents. My mother passed away on August 30th, and I have been immersed in the process of releasing and healing the past. This process includes lots of memories, and lots of choices about what to remember, what to treasure, and what to release and leave in the years gone by.

Oh, the anguish from walking the path of a solitary child, an unattached existence, wild, like a wood sorrel bloom timid on the silent forest floor. And now, to know its transformation into a deep appreciation for this life, led and fed, by a power and a love greater than any parent could have ever given me.

From a renewed look through years distant from those days this gift rose up. The gift--a perspective, cultivated and honed from a lifetime of walking without the closeness, the unconditional love of family. The gift—a deep appreciation for the solitude, un-enmeshed from the emotional dysfunction of the family I was born into. The gift—I now have the wisdom, temperament, and strength to hold my sister as she agonizes through the pain of the immediate family members crashing against each other.

I embrace this capacity born out of the wound as a precious gift.

THE MANTLE OF LOVE
Like a cloak His Love is wrapped around me.
Like a warm garment It shelters me from the storms of life.
I feel and know that an Almighty Love envelops me in Its close embrace.
O Love Divine,
My Love, how wonderful Thou art.
I am open to receive
Thy great blessing.
Love envelops me.
~Ernest Holmes

"Trust the one who can see these 3 things in you: Sorrow behind your smile, Love behind your anger, and Meaning behind your silence." ~Author Unknown

There Is Only the One Creator, Goddess

There is only One Creator. It is the Goddess, the Mother creating Herself as the Universe, as every living and non-living form. Goddess has created the mountains and the oceans, the stars and the planets out of all that She is. She is omnipresent, omniscient, and omnipotent; She knows all there is to know, and gives of Herself unconditionally all the time.

Goddess is alive within me as my very heartbeat, as my very breath. I am made of the essence of Goddess, at the core of who I am is Her Peace, Her Wisdom, the Life that She is. This is true of me and every person breathing within and as Her Creation. Every word I speak, every thought that flows through me is sourced within her Essence.

I, therefore, speak my word with the understanding that I am divinely guided by Her Wisdom in all that I say, and all that I do, and that all is infused with Goddess. I declare that Her divine Love vibrates through every cell of this body temple in such a way that it expands out from my core into the world at large and touches every heart within my circle. This Love of Goddess draws into my Life the power of this Love in return so that I am surrounded by my complements in other people. All of my relationships are rooted in the deep harmony of Goddess so that I am supported, and successful in all activities, in work, in relationship, in prosperity, in health. Nothing is preventing the upleveling of my experience of Goddess, and She shows up in greater and more loving ways not only for myself but for everyone. For there is only One of us here, and I accept this Unity in, through, and as the Mother Goddess right here, right now.

In gratitude and with thanksgiving I let Her do what She does best. For “I can of mine own self do nothing.” (John 5:30) “But the Creator that dwelleth in me, this Creator doeth the work.” (John 14:10)

Amen.

The Soul of Money

I have been revisiting this book by Lynne Twist. She's been around the world as a fundraiser and activist for World Hunger and many others. She shares a story of a people that live deep in the Amazon rain forest, the Achuar people. This village of people have no culture based in money, have not used currency of any kind that exchanges hands for goods or services. Instead their culture is all inclusive in how it cares for its family and I can't get this image out of my mind. Imagine: When their child gets married both families come together and build the new couple their home. All they will need to begin their lives together is provided by their community. When a hunter brings food back from the jungle all the people gather to feast and share the food. No one is left without support and sustenance. She contrasts this way of life with the life of our modern monetary culture by sharing the experience of a designated native who lived with them in the US and learned our language and the culture of money. Our entire culture, purpose in living, and relationships as a community are based on the accumulation and value of money and consumerism. A person's value is based on their relationship and success with money. If you do not have it, have failed to earn it or succeed in the game of money, you are left to wither away, abandoned. What a contrast! I have been trying on the feeling of what it must be like to live in a community that gives freely of all of its resources with no intention or concept of keeping something for themselves when others are without. I am struck deeply by the inhumanity of our monetary culture and how it has destroyed our capacity to love and care for one another.